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Thread: Winalot diet

  1. #1
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    Jul 2009
    Lincoln, Lincolnshire, Un
    David Benson

    Winalot diet

    Nicked from elsewhere as it made me chuckle..

    Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's buying a large bag of Winalot
    dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman
    behind me asked if I had a dog.

    What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have
    little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was
    starting the Winalot Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
    because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I
    woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices
    and IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
    it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one
    or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so
    it works well and I was going to try it again.

    (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now
    enthralled with my story.)
    Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
    food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an
    Irish Setter's bottom and a car hit me.

    I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
    laughing so hard.

    I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.

    Better watch what you ask retired people.
    They have all the time in the world to think of daft things to say.
    Big box but the hamster died..
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